So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
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