I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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