:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
