Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize