There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
