SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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