just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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