before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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