mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize