Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
