I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
