dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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