No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
