Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
