just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
