You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize