I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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