We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
