Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
