Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize