My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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