what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize