Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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