At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
