We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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