that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
