we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
