are you still at the devil's house?
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
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