You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
