How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
