when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
MIDGETS
????
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
