planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
