how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize