Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
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Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
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I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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