I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
