I faked an abortion last night.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
