I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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