They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Randomize
