belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Is it because I queefed?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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