Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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