Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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