sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
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