i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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