she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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