Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
