Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
