No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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