they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
