Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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