we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
